Why are People Attending Conferences? Networking.

In her recent post, Personal Branding Blog author Liz Lynch quoted “according to Meetings & Conventions magazine, more than 27 million people attend conferences, trade shows, and conventions each year. And the main reason they go is to network.”

With humor she went on to comment on selling, “No one is walking around thinking, “I’m really in the mood to hire a consultant today” or “I’m not leaving until I spend millions on computer software.”  So avoid turning your conversations into sales pitches, even if you know for certain that you can help.”

She agrees with my thoughts on coming to any networking meeting ready with some key points to cover, “Connections happen through conversation, but if you’re not prepared, most of your discussions will consist primarily of small talk.  While some of this is necessary to get the ball rolling, too much won’t advance your relationship very far.”

In Part 1 of her series she focuses on setting clear goals, and Part 3 wraps up with insight on how to maximize your time. All three articles in the series are worth a read and you may want to consider adding her posts to your RSS feed. I bet she’ll have more to offer as you grow your networking skills.

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Networking Cattle Call

Lately I have been attending and writing about small group networking options. This week I did the opposite. From one of the many social medias I follow I was invited to a brand new networking event called Spark. It was to be held one of the newest and most dramatic places downtown and I had been curious to see the space. The program was about generating and supporting new business ideas, which is always interesting and the price was practically free. Moreover, I have learned over time that  when I hear about a new networking event – just go. It is an opportunity to be in a room with lots of bright shiny new faces, and in this case lots and lots of new faces. The crowd was massive and diverse, but luckily dotted with a few familiar faces which makes getting started easier.

The great thing about attending a one-time or launch of an event is that there are no groups or cliques. Some people may come with a friend or colleague but most people are on their own and looking for someone to talk with. And since they served need-a-fork food I had an easy excuse to barge into a tall table grouping in order to eat. People always welcome you to their cluster if they see you juggling a glass a fork and a plate of food. Normally I don’t recommend filling both hands as it inhibits handshaking and card exchanging, but if you are heading to a table it can be an asset. While you are in the food line, look around for an opening at a likely table.

At a large event try not to get overwhelmed by the amount of bodies. You can use the same tricks to get comfortable as in a small group, and it is easier to have a discussion in a food line when it is moving slowly. It is also easier to melt away when others join a conversation and move on to meet more people.

Like any other event, try to have a few good conversations. Spend more time with people you are likely to do business with later and move on from people who are too many steps away from being a direct sale or resource. In a one-shot event, you can’t focus on who they may know, you won’t get to know anyone well enough to create an environment for a referral. Save that for your membership groups where you can build long-term relationships.

Lastly, if there are speaking sessions you are interested in go, if not there are always folks hanging back and still networking in the halls and cocktail room. When the masses head into the program, a huge event gets a lot smaller. If you hate crowds it will offer a welcome breather and a chance to get to know others who may feel the same way.

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You Never Realize Who You Know

A new networking bonanza has started. Last week I attended the first in a long run of graduation parties. The adult daughter of a friend was there, a young woman I have known since she was 2 years old. In chatting with her I learned that she was moving home to start a second master’s degree so she could change careers.

It seems there was a time that people did this because they were unhappy with their job or career, now I am running into people going back to school because they can’t find work in a career they love.

Well, not if I can help it. Hearing her story, my networking light switched on and I thought of four people I knew  — not well, but well enough to contact on behalf of someone else. Every single person I emailed responded, and my friend has one interview set up already.

What really made me think was how easy it was to email, pick up the phone and send a Facebook message for someone else. It can be so hard to do all those things to ask for work or help for yourself. So this brings me to three conclusions:

• It’s not as hard as we think. Most people won’t kill you for calling or blacklist you for one email inquiry. In fact, when I am relaxed and have something specific to say, I have had some great conversations from cold and warm calls.

• Or maybe it is that hard. If reaching out by phone or email still feels like torture, do it on behalf of someone else.  Of the people I called one was a past client from ages ago, one was a fellow board member I hadn’t spoken to in years, and one was a person I had met once at a networking function but am on her mailing list. The last was the sister of a high school friend. None were people I speak to regularly or feel like I know well, but contacting even loose or old connections for someone else felt like second nature.

• You can make it a little easier. I am always happy to call someone I know to help them out, but I rarely think to ask someone to do it on my behalf. It is hard to ask favors, but worth it. Most people you know would be happy to help – they just don’t really understand what you do or what you need. A party is a great place to chat about what you are looking for. I had forgotten the field my friend was in and was surprised I had four contacts who were great prospects for her.

By the way, in reaching out for my friend, I ended up scheduling a meeting with the networking contact. While that wasn’t my intent, what I realize I did was rekindle four stagnant relationships. So, one party down, at least four more on the calendar. Great opportunities to reconnect with old friends, meet new people, be honest about where I need help and grateful for the generosity of others.

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Finding the Right Room

Lately I have had the opportunity to do some more focused networking. and have already noticed the difference. Attending a networking event where everyone in the room is a potential client offers significantly more potential for striking up a valuable conversation.

As noted by Chris Brogan in his recent post Get More Out of Conferences and Networking Events, at any event the questions of “…which of these are people you should connect with? Who here is a client? Who’s a future partner? Where are your new friends that you’ll keep in touch with in coming years?” make it hard to jump in.  Choosing your event carefully can make it so much easier.

At a broad networking event, say a Chamber, local business group or  a vertical organization (like gender, nationality or religion based) you will meet a wide variety of people. These are excellent venues to meet potential clients, referrers, partners, suppliers, and lunch partners. Over time and with a commitment to the group, relationships build that allows this to happen. Open groups are also excellent for practicing networking skills.

Targeted networking is about fishing where the highest concentrations of fish are. If you sell products or services to real estate agents, there may be a few at general networking events, but at the association of realtors meeting the room will be full of prospects. You probably can’t pick a bad seat. If you don’t meet the perfect prospect, you are still likely to learn something raises the value proposition of the event.

To find events right for you look at your target audiences. Even if you can work with anyone, defining a few core areas will improve your positioning and marketing effectiveness. Having a focus makes it easier to make decisions and respond to inquiries and more likely that you will be seen as a resource rather than a vendor when attending industry events. As an example, look at Gail Bower. Gail is a consultant who works with nonprofits handling many issues including marketing and event strategy. Within this area Gail has a special niche – she is a sponsorship expert. Where is Gail networking? Not at generic marketing or event planning groups, but at much more narrow events like a meeting of fundraising professionals or a group for festival planners. When she mentions she has solutions to sponsorship problems, I bet heads turn.

In the right room, Gail is a rock star. Where is your room? What do you know that a specific audience will think is gold?  Chances are there’s a group, meeting, conference or association where you can turn heads too. How do you find that room? Ask your current clients what associations or professional societies they belong to, research online and look for conferences where the speakers are talking about your niche. Go as an attendee the first time to make sure you are in the right place then move on to speaking, serving on a committee, providing a financial or in-kind donations and/or becoming a trade show vendor. Contributing your time and expertise to the right audience is an excellent way to build relationships that lead to speaking invitations, referrals and client engagements.

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7 Ideas for Small Group Networking

A great way to expand your network and be recognized as a leader is to bring a few people together and see what happens. Need some ideas for what to do? Try these new ideas for finding common ground:

1. Trending Topic — By following some local people on Twitter I saw a post from Valeria Maltoni of Conversation Agent about a free gathering to talk about social media.   I have learned to just go when I think something might be interesting and am usually glad I did. With coffee donated by Saxby’s and space provided by Villanova University, we had a dynamic breakfast gathering of about 20 people, only one of whom I had ever met before.
2. Similar Client Focus — I was recently invited to a small lunch gathering by Julie Friedman Bacchini of Neptune Moon Design. We met once at a member-based networking group and she decided to invite me and 5 other people who all work with non-profits to a lunch.  I met some interesting people, got some new ideas and found a new writer to add to my list of resources.
3. Cross Pollinating —  Know some people from one group who would be great for another? I have some peers from an association who are thinking of starting a new, niche association. They reached out to active members and mixed in other colleagues to explore the idea.
4. Six Degrees — Years ago I met a dynamic marketer at Aramark. who is a generous referrer. Since we met, she has introduced me to a fabulous writer, and a number of other marketers. Those referrals have connected me to a brilliant strategist, subcontractors and a host of clients. I realized that the original contacts had all moved on and had not seen each other in person in years — a perfect time to arrange a lunch or drinks to thanks them for the bounty their efforts bring.
5. Shared Need — A colleague recently introduced me to Linda Bandura, a startup marketer/designer. Within a week of meeting, Linda invited me to a head shot party she arranged with her photographer. It was a small gathering of women professionals to chat, drink tea and get that professional portrait taken that we need but all avoid. A fun way to network — and a brilliant way for a photographer to meet new prospects and a marketer to be seen as a leader. I liked it so much, I am thinking of planning one of my own and inviting clients and prospects.
6. Fun for a Cause — Many nonprofits host social events as fundraisers. I was invited to join a group for Martini’s and Makeovers at Saks Fifth Avenue to support Dragonfly Forest, a camp for children with serious illnesses. Going to a public event with a few others you know makes it easier to try something new.
7. Great Resource Discussion — Rather than your standard book group, try gathering to share your best resource. You could each share a synopsis of the lessons learned from a recent blog, webinar, conference or a favorite website.

An advantage of the micro-event is that it is once and done. No weekly meeting, no heavy preparation unless the group wants that. The purpose is to bring together people with some shared interest to then branch off and form their own new relationships.

The interesting thing about these events is that none of the leaders self promoted. Just coordinating and connecting raised their profile and left the impression of leadership — without saying a word other than “welcome” and “ I thought you might like to know each other”.  Think about what kind of mini-events you can plan to get to know new resources, referrers and prospects.

Looking for other ideas for how to connect in small groups, read Networking Goes Small.

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New Trend: Networking Goes Small

My niece started college this year at a large state university. Due to scheduling, she wasn’t able to join the club sport she participated in all through high school. It wasn’t long before she realized that she was having trouble finding a group among the masses and needed to find a way to scale down her experience. As a child she was a swimmer, so she joined the swimming club and has now found a group she can call her own. The huge crowd has been brought down to relationship scale.

When joining a new organization the size can often be overwhelming. Joining – or creating – a small group-within-a-group Is a great stepping stone to one-on-one relationships. Some trends to try:

• Find a club — Affinity clubs help people bond over similar interests. Sharing a favorite activity with a small group is a great way to build contacts and friendships. If your favorite activity isn’t available, start your own.

• Take it online – Online communities are great for addressing special interests. Facebook, LinkedIn and Flickr all have privacy settings that allow only members to see content. Connecting with members online often allows people to stay in touch and learn more about each other faster.

• Bring it offline – Like everywhere else, in online communities people are seeking personal connection. Twitter users are connecting in person with local events called “tweetups”. Search www.search.twitter.com for events in your area. The NHL team the Washington Capitals created a LinkedIn group for fans and then invited them to a game. Read “A Different Look at Networking” to learn more. If you have joined a group and are only participating virtually, attend an in-person meet-up or plan one yourself.

• Get social – Choose a few people you know a little and host a micro-event. Bringing together people you know who don’t know each other is a great way to get to know everyone better. For some great ideas, read 7 Ideas for Small Group Networking.

Sometimes the hardest part is getting to know the first few people. If you meet one person, ask him or her whom else you should know. Get a few of those people together to discuss a topic of common interest, industry trends, or just to meet others and you have a manageable event that is less stressful than a room full of people and more comfortable for some than a one-on-one lunch or meeting.

For people looking to make friends or build business relationships, a small group invitation can help avoid uncomfortable situations, confusion with dating, or worry about having enough to say. Next time you’d like to get to know someone better, invite a few others and see what happens.

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3 Ideas to Make Networking Easier

Networking is hard enough without being in the wrong room. Choosing the right organizations, where you have the best chance of feeling comfortable, showing up and meeting great people is key. Some great tips come from Jill Walser in an article titled “How I Overcame My Aversion to Networking and Learned to Love It”:

I initially looked at about eight different options and decided that the organizations I chose needed to meet four criteria:
1. They needed to be relevant to what I did.
2. They needed to have a face-to-face component and the people there needed to be happy to see me.
3. They needed to be filled with spark plugs – people very excited to be there and to be doing what they did for a living.
4. They needed to be easy to get to and offered at convenient times.

And to make it fun, try Ilise Benun’s tip:

You can even use [your nametag] to ask a question about a resource you need (“Know any good designers?”) Make it funny or unusual. Others will notice and see it as an invitation into conversation.

From her excellent article “How Not To Network”. Scroll down and read all the comments, there are some great ideas.

Jamie Ridler‘s strategy is to think differently about what you are doing. In her article “Give up Networking and Grow” she says:

“I’m that woman at the networking meeting having one more cup of coffee just to have something to do (and trust me, more caffeine doesn’t improve the situation). As a business owner, I knew I couldn’t go on like this. I had to do something to grow my circle, and I wanted to do it in a way that was authentic and that felt good.”

There are so many great ideas for overcoming reluctance to get involved. Try some of these and see if there is a gem in there for you.

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Prime Seating

One of the things I always find fascinating is that people from the same company attend a networking meeting together and stay together the entire time. Many events have a stand-up networking time followed by a seated presentation or meal.  If you have come with colleagues — or just chatted with the folks you know during the open networking time, now is the time to change it up. Some tips to to find great networking seats:

• When it is close to time to be seated, find someone new to talk to and then move with them to a seat.
• Scout the tables as people are seating themselves. Look for one that is almost full so you have the most opportunity to meet people.
• If you are more comfortable connecting with your own gender, look for tables that have someone you think you could talk to.
• Think about your best clients – their gender, age, how they dress. It can give you clues to others who may be good prospects. I frequently work with marketing directors and have noticed that they often dress a bit more adventurously than others, so I look for someone in a brighter color, a pattern or fabulous shoes. If I am wrong, it still gives me something to compliment as a conversation opener.
• If there will be a presentation, grab the seat at the back of the table. I recently got stuck in a front seat and had to figure out how to gracefully eat soup while watching the presenter who was behind me. Note to coordinators – think about what you are serving if your presenter will speak during the meal.
• If it is not a meal, and the chairs are set up in rows, find someone to sit with whom you spoke to during open networking.
• Look for others who did not come with colleagues and sit with them.

Networking doesn’t have to end when you sit down. With just a little observation and strategy, the whole event can be more productive.

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Overcoming a Bad Start

There is nothing worse than being late to a sit-down event. If you ever had the weight of 30 eyes on you as you walk in to a room full of strangers, you know what I mean.

Earlier this week I had the pleasure of being invited to an exclusive event run by professional speaker, productivity expert and supreme networker, Neen James. It was a morning event downtown at the city club to which I belong. Excellent, I do that drive all the time and know where to park (a stresser in any city) and which back roads to take. Or so I thought.

This meeting started at 8:30 am, an hour later than then many morning networking events I have attended at the Club. I live and work a mile and a half apart in the suburbs, so I am not a seasoned commuter. Apparently, you can’t use 7:30 traffic as a guide for all rush hour traffic. To make matters worse, one reliable back road had a car accident, and it was trash day in the city – which I discovered when the trash truck trapped me two car lengths from where I had to turn into the garage.

Of course I wanted to turn around and forget it once I realized I was going to be embarrassingly late, but I did not want the hostess to regret inviting me. The challenge on a day like this is how to put the stress and embarrassment behind you and have a productive event. Some tips to get you back on track:

• Take a minute. Take off your coat, check your hair, put on some lipstick (if appropriate) and take a breath. Flying into the room with a flustered apology only calls more attention to yourself.
• Get settled. Scan for a seat, and get situated without fuss. If you think you’ll need a pen or a mint, make it accessible before entering the room.
• Focus. You made it, don’t waste the effort. Turn your attention to the speaker and really pay attention.
• Apologize later. Afterwards, if it was small enough of a gathering for the host to notice, make one sincere apology and limit the excuses.

You can still have a worthwhile networking day even with a bad start. I have three meetings set up already and a number of LinkedIn invites from an event that started badly. Don’t shrink into your shell, shake it off and do what you came for, you’ll be glad you made the effort.

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Joining a Networking Conversation – Start at the Top

What I hear most often from people is “how do you just walk up to people and start talking?”

Ok, so most of the time when networking, you are walking into a room that already has a number of people – and they all seem like they are already talking to someone. Great, now what?

What you have to remember is that unlike a dinner party, many of the people talking to each other just met a minute ago, you are not interrupting lifelong friends catching up. Still breaking into a conversation can be intimidating. There are so many ways to do this, I will need a number of posts.

If you are going to an event where you are totally new and expect not to know a soul, try engaging the staff or board.

1. Email before the event and ask a question or two. It can be anything from directions to what type of people usually come. When you arrive, ask the check in staff to point out the person you were emailing so you can introduce yourself and thank them for their help. It will be easier because you already have started a relationship by phone or email, and it is a good excuse to break in if the person is already talking to someone.
2. Find the board members. If the person you were emailing is the person at the desk, then you need another option. They don’t have time to talk to you. Ask them to point out the board members or other leaders – a membership chair is good, they always want to talk to potential members. You can say “I’m new and Mary suggested I introduce myself to you.”
3. Ask for an introduction. The board member should know many of the attendees, so use them to get you to a good prospect. Tell them briefly what you do and the type of people you hope to meet. Ask them if there is anyone there you should definitely meet. Every board member I have ever known will walk you right over and get the next conversation started.

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